LiveWorld Transcripts

HBO presents

Dr. Perelman
"Sex and the City" Shrink Talk

July 19, 2000

"Sex and the City" presents Dr. Perelman who discusses, in an online interview, issues concerning sex, relationships, and dating.

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HBO: Welcome to Shrink Talk! . Did this week's episode of "Sex and the City" bring up some familiar issues for you? . Dr. Perelman is live, ready to field your questions about relationships, sex and dating.

Dr. Perelman: First we do have to remind everyone that this webcast is not therapy and is broadcast only for purposes of education and entertainment. Let's talk about some of the issues.

Aqua: When is the right time to know your ready for sex?

Dr. Perelman: That's a good question in that it is a question that every person has to answer for themselves. The age range when someone first decides to have a sexual experience may vary considerably, depending on personal beliefs and religious convictions. Essentially there is no one or right answer to this question. Additionally, when you first choose to have a sexual experience in any given relationship may also vary with a number of different and personal factors. I advise my patients to, in a sense, take advantage of the current sexual health crisis and actually proceed slowly and gradually, so that their clothes come off as their emotions unfold.

LosingIt: What should I look for in a partner to share my first sexual experience with?

Dr. Perelman: Probably the most important thing is to look for values that the two of you share so that you have the sense and comfort of both cherishing what the other person believes and feeling cherished yourself by the other individual. What do some of the rest of you think that would be important factors to look for in deciding whether or not to make someone your lover?

Kewtee: What age do you think is appropriate for dating today? And how long is the 'norm' for the dating period before marriage?

Dr. Perelman: This is a situation that will vary considerably from community to community, based on the beliefs of the individuals involved. Generally speaking, in the United States dating is a common place activity during the teenage years. Usually people begin by participating in group events that allow for flirtation and conversation while being protectively buffered by the presence of others. Age of first marriage in the U.S. is later (during the 20s) then a generation ago, but again, the range of these statistics vary greatly across a variety of socio-economic factors. How old does the audience feel someone should be prior to their considering marriage? How old is old enough? What factors of maturity, sophistication, and experience would you look for?

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