LiveWorld Transcripts

HBO presents

Dr. Cotsen
"Sex and the City" Shrink Talk!

July 26, 2000

Dr. Cotsen answers your questions about sex, relationships, and dating in relation to the latest episode of HBO's "Sex and the City."

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HBO: Welcome to Shrink Talk! Did this week's episode bring up some familiar "issues" for you? Dr. Adam Cotsen is live, ready to field your questions about relationships, sex and dating.

Dr. Cotsen: Hello everybody, I hope you all enjoyed tonight's show.

Anne: What is the difference between flirting and teasing?

Dr. Cotsen: Well, I think flirting and teasing mean different things to different people. Generally speaking, flirting is a good thing, and it's a way of expressing romantic interest in someone, whereas teasing means making fun of someone. Nonetheless, the two may overlap, because some people like to flirt, by means of good-natured teasing. Such as, pulling on somebody's ponytail.

Shyguy: What is the minimum age for people to begin using Viagra? And are there any reported serious side effects?

Dr. Cotsen: Well, the main side effects of Viagra would be headache, and feeling warm or flushed in the face. I don't believe that Viagra has been tested in people under the age of 18. The important thing to keep in mind with respect to Viagra is that you absolutely cannot take it if you are on any medications containing nitroglycerine, or other nitrate compounds. Many cardiac medications fit this description, as do the street drug "poppers." If you have any questions about what medications would be safe, please consult with a doctor. But, on the bright side, Viagra really is a remarkably effective medication and a great plus in our treatment for male erectile dysfunction.

Q: Have there been any advances in a feminine form of Viagra?

Dr. Cotsen: Unfortunately, a recent clinical trial of Viagra for the purposes of female lack of orgasm proved to be negative. That is, it didn't help. There is some current thought that small doses of testosterone may be helpful for female lack of orgasm. Or lack of sex drive. But, this is still somewhat controversial. Please check with your gynecologist.

Confused: I watch the show all the time; can you tell me do women like the ones from the show really exist? They are so confident and attractive.

Dr. Cotsen: Clearly, you don't live here in Los Angeles! (smile) Although, the women on the show are quite attractive, they nonetheless have their share of very human insecurities. I'd be curious to know what sort of confidence or unrealistic confidence you see in our four heroines.

MarriedanHappy: Dr Cotsen, Samantha once said, "Practically all relationships I know are built on a foundation of lies and mutually accepted delusion." Do you think that in many relationships this is true, at least in the beginning?

Dr. Cotsen: Well, in general I think this statement is overly cynical. Perhaps in the beginning two people may be falling in love more with their fantasies of each other than the reality of the other person, hence, the "mutually accepted delusion." However, for a relationship to survive and be healthy it must progress to the point where both people are aware of and accept reality of the other person. That's really the only way to end up married and happy, Ms. MarriedanHappy!

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