Author of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus"

USWest presents

February 14, 2000

USWest presents Dr. John Gray, the best-selling author of "Men Are From Mars and Women Are From Venus", discussing relationships, communication, and romance.

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USWest: Welcome to a one-hour live chat with relationship expert Dr. John Gray U S WEST is partnering with the best-selling author of "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus" to answer your questions and offer you tips on making every day Valentine's Day and becoming a total communicator with U S WEST Total Package. U S WEST invites you to ask John questions on how to strengthen your relationships through communication and technology. Welcome John!

John Gray: Hi, it's a pleasure to spend this time with you. I look forward to doing my best to answer your questions.

Pammy: Why is communication such a key part of relationships?

John Gray: Never before in history have our expectations been so high in relationships. Both men and women want what we often see in the magazines, and in the movies, and on TV. However, no one has been taught how to successfully accomplish lasting romance. It has never occurred in history. But we want it. It is possible, but to achieve greater intimacy, we have to understand better the way our partners think and feel, and the uniqueness of their wishes, wants, and needs. By improving communication, we can accomplish that goal. And romance, and lasting romance, becomes a possibility, a REAL possibility.

Lonnie: What are some simple communication ideas to keep romance alive every day?

John Gray: Always taking a few minutes to have a meaningful conversation or interaction with your intimate partner makes an enormous difference. Often, couples get caught up in the routine of living, and doing, what they are responsible for, and they forget, simply, to look at their partner. Listen to their partner. And connect with their partner. In my own personal life, when I'm travelling or away, I use technology to create a meaningful connection. I make sure to call my wife every day, even if for a few minutes, and ask her about her day, and briefly share a little about mine. When I arrive at the airport, I let her know, with a quick call from my wireless, that I'm on my way home, and give her my estimated arrival time. These little considerations make a big difference, particularly for women. Otherwise, she will tend to feel neglected and ignored, and become unable to give him the kind of support he's wanting. Women often know, intuitively know, what they need to make a relationship work. However, many of these expectations are unrealistic, but with new technology, it becomes more possible. We all are limited in time, these days. By using Internet access, we not only can achieve things faster, like purchasing, shopping, or planning a romantic getaway, but we also have access to the experts. Before, if somebody wanted to take a workshop with me, they might have to travel across the country and spend lots of money. Now, at their fingertips, they can visit my site, www.marsvenus.com and benefit from my expertise. Obvio usly, there are so many other resources and experts and information that people can access and be inspired by. It's important to get this support, if we're going to change our habit patterns, which have been in existence on this planet for tens of thousands of years. Change can happen, but we have to be continually reminded of what works, and what doesn't. Particularly in a relationship with someone from another planet. There's no way we can intuitively know what the opposite sex needs, or feels, or thinks, because often we are so different. By improving communications, both verbally, and using communication technology, we have a realistic chance of creat ing lasting romance.

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